Loki Prince of Asgard
by time2read
Summary: Post the dark world. Loki is now king of Asgard yet he is not content. Loki's musing on being a monster.


Hey guys? Wow well I am used to writing SW fics this is my first Loki one;P Enjoy;P

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**Loki Prince of Asgard**

Loki walked back and forth in his chambers, no Odin's chambers. He was king he had all of Asgard at his whim even the warriors three. Why? Wasn't it enough? Wasn't the throne enough?

Even Heimdel the all-seeing was fooled. He should be ecstatic.

But no, no he never wanted this, to be king. All he ever wanted no needed it was, it was acceptance. To be Thor's equal. He couldn't understand why? Why was it Odin's affection he was so intent on getting? It was mother, no Frigga who was always there and now. He clenched a fist.

A memory resurfaced. It was her reading to him and Thor about the dark elves. He recalled Thor waving his wooden sword around, "Mother, I will kill all the dark elves if they ever come back!"

He remembered their mother answer, "What if they return with peace."

Loki frowned, "But they are monsters mother, surely they will not come trying to befriend us."

Frigga had sighed and smiled sadly, "Loki, monsters are not born, they are made."

If, if he wasn't born a monster if per say as the midgardian saying went history was written by the victors if if, he nervously unclenched and clenched his hands pacing, the frost giants were not the monsters they were said to be then what was he?

He had killed Laufey, his father, he never knew. What was he? Was he a monster by birth or had he truly made himself one? Why had he been so focused on Odin's attention?

A blood curling yell escaped his lips. He had beforehand placed a silencer spell but checked again for reassurance. He slammed his fist into a wall. "Take the staircase to the left." Why had he said that? Why did he miscalculate, it wasn't his intent to to kill. He yelled again. He wouldn't, couldn't cry. Did she suffer? The tears that flowed were not his own curse her why did he feel this way?

She was and never would be his mother. Why? He shuddered, taking in a breath. The chitauri they would be coming. He had to be prepared. He couldn't fall apart now. Not when his realm needed him most.

Why? Why did he care so much for Asgard when it had rejected him in everything even heritage? Perhaps it wasn't Asgard that he cared for perhaps, perhaps a part of him would fight for Jotunheim. He owed them that much after killing their king, his father.

He didn't even know the man. How would he ever know why he was left behind! He should have asked! Was he rejected by Jotunheim as well? Or was he accidentally left behind.

He laughed bitterly. To leave behind a prince in an undefended temple? Now he would never know. The question ate at him. Perhaps this was what he needed. And the fault, the fault was all his own! Maybe Laufey would have accepted him small and weak as he was. Perhaps not but he would know!

He gazed at the circular mirror he had place on the wall and gazed inside. Odin was still inside sleeping fitfully. Why? Why couldn't he bring himself to kill the man? Curse Frigga it was her face he saw when he unsheathed the knife. Her sad face shaking her head and crying, crying mockingly, no crying for him.

If he had told the Allfather of Thanos who would have believed him? Backed his word? Surely Thor, after all he had given his life for him. Or so Thor thought. No he could never be Loki to the world again not now atleast.

In Midgard he was feared in Jotunheim hated and here, he was laughed at mocked derided, what would it take? Thor golden Thor, everything had always been easy for his brother. He was always forgiven and his friends they would go with him to Hell. Who did he have? His magic? His Tricks? His broken pride? His defeated existence? No what he had left was something laughable really, honor, broken but yes believe it or not it was there. He had let the Tesseract consume him, let? When did he begin to lie to himself? He was weak and foolish but perhaps this foolishness would save the nine realms.

When he had fallen his mind was torn asunder by the void. But he had pieced it together. Albeit late but he had done it. The chitauri were furious they had sought to use his empty vessel; he had convinced them of his resolve. He had played his part well, what were a few midgardians in the equation? They let him go, that had been a mistake on their part. One he would use well. The dark elves were but a minor interference in their plans. He never worried for the realms if the dark elves would have triumphed, the chitauri would have simply entered the picture sooner.

But he had miscalculated. Frigga no his, his mother, his shoulders slumped in defeat, she had died. She would never see him for what he was. She would have understood. So let them hurt me, hate me, kick me down until there is nothing left betray me, but, I myself will do no such thing! He would be punished severely for Odin's captivity if anyone found out and he would be. He seemed to have a losing streak when it came to Thor who had foolishly believed he defeated the chitauri with his friends in spandex when in truth all he vanquished was a small scouting party, a small portion of the darkness. And if he was caught, punished even killed that would be only a small flaw in the equation. It didn't matter, he was always the one cleaning things up after his brother, he would defeat Thanos it was a matter of not just payback but honor.

After all monsters are best at killing other monsters.


End file.
